October 2nd, 2006

life realization # 1

I have been used to, somehow, commute all by myself.

Since then, I enjoyed the serenity it brings whenever I am alone.

Self-contemplation, so it seems.

Of my road adventures, I have seen a lot of life's situations, all different from the other.

There I realized one thing.

That in this world, there are still a lot of good people.

Marami pa rin pala ang mababait na tao, though it seems that I live in a tough and sometimes cruel world. I live just an ordinary face to billion faces, a stranger, but I never failed to witness good things, and I never failed to experience good things from, yes, strangers. it's not just one experience, but a collection, the reason why i just posted it right now in my blog.

It's just so great to live through good things in life despite of how evil (sortof) the world seem to be...

And I would say that for that, I gain a peace of mind and a breathing space for my soul.

NOTE: If you look at life, and the world, itself as awful and bad, it is because perhaps you are looking at a half-empty glass of water.

Posted by Memaine at 08:22 AM | ibulong mo na.

and then nostalgia hits me

kanina, nakikinig ako ng radyo.. 90.7 yata..

pinapatugtog rivermaya, si bamboo pa yung vocalist... yung himala...
umpisa pa lang lam ko na himala yun, panahon pa ni bamboo..

sabi ko, andaya, dapat eheads din...
tas sabi ng dj, they're playing songs from great bands ever...

sabi ko, basta maghihintay ako..

anlakas ng feeling ko na magpapatugtog sila ng eheads..

kaso, antagal na.. wala pa rin...

 

namputcha, pinatugtog, torpedo ng eheads! to the max kong nilakasan yung radyo.. grabe! naririnig ko ang boses ni ely at ang palo ni raims, sama mo pa ang hataw ni buddy at marcus!

tuwang tuwa talaga ako..
ilang oras din kong hinintay yun...

 

di ko pa pinatay ang radyo...
ilang oras din yun...
napahinto na lang ako saka naluha...
pinatugtog yung

MINSAN...

"Ngunit ngayon,
Kay bilis maglaho ng kahapon
Sana'y huwag kalimutan
Ang ating mga pinagsamahan.
At kung sakaling gipitin ay
Laging iisipin na
Minsan tayo ay naging tunay na
Magkaibigan.
....
Kahit an anong gawin
Lahat ng bagay ay merong hangganan.
Dahil ngayon,
Tayo ay nilimot ng kahapon.
Di na mapipilitang buhayin
Ang ating pinagsamahan.
Ngunit kung sakaling mapadaan,
Baka ikaw ay aking tawagan
Dahil minsan tayo ay naging tunay na
Magkaibigan..."

aaww... huhu, nakakaiyak..

Posted by Memaine at 08:17 AM | ibulong mo na.

losing the sanity

pumunta ko sa pinakamataas na lugar...

>>32 feet "yata" from the ground<<

nagmasid ng mga sasakyang animo'y toy cars

pinagtripan panuorin yung mga taong akala mo langgam...

ang taas ng lugar na pinagkakalagyan ko...

nag-iisa...

umiiyak...

nababaliw na yata ako...

Posted by Memaine at 08:14 AM | ibulong mo na.

creativity of love

so what is exactly the creativity of love? why is love creative?

damn. such a question i faced in my philo recitation. such a question i couldn't answer. swear.

i could barely melt to where i was standing.

but behind the question, behind those grades in recitation, behind those remarks in sir's class record, behind everybody's anxiety of the "ultimate truth", behind my nonsense answer, why is it such a creative thing?

with its vast meaning, why is it creative?

because it is a grace. it is a gift. it is a paradox.

and i believe that it is the most paradoxical thing ever.

...now i know...

Posted by Memaine at 08:11 AM | ibulong mo na.

August 27th, 2006

*damn.

Untitled

i feel incomplete. 70% incomplete.

i ought to be happy, after starting a new life.

but new life seems to mean new *me*

and i hate the feeling, guessed i hate this new me... i felt i never really know myself right now.

shit. SINO BA AKO? tsk, di ko na alam.

andaming nawala sakin. andami, natutulala na lang ako. i don't know how to find those things, i don't know WHAT to find. i feel helpless. can anyone save me?

yeahyeah. eto na naman ako, feeling magpapakamatay, feeling hopeless na naman, feeling nagdadrama.

can i just go back to who i was.

who i was before? ako yung laging umiiyak, laging malungkot, laging in pain... pero i can always find what and who would make me happy, like happiness is always there...

now... hindi na nga ako nasasaktan, pero hindi ako masaya. yeah i laugh, i smile but feel empty.

E-M-P-T-Y.

so, i missed having the pain in the ass. i missed being hurt by anyone or by anything.

 

hurt me. please.

Currently listening to: dream
Currently feeling: empty.
Posted by Memaine at 10:09 AM | 1 bulong

middle of confusion

i am now in a middle of confusion...

arte. in short, confused ako...

hmm... ano ba. i don't want to be in this situation. ever. again.

 

but i just can't help myself.

Currently feeling: uncomfortable
Posted by Memaine at 09:52 AM | ibulong mo na.

January 3rd, 2006

tulog na.

i found myself staring at the computer right now,, and listening to MTV...

MTV is at its best right now (11:26pm)

pinoybands are airing, itchywoms, pupil, ya name it!

b-but... sugarfree! comm'on! and my favorite tulog na (the song and the video)... hay! para akong hinehele, an innocent child, free from any disturbances in life, enjoying the lullabye plus the calmness of the late night! wala na akong iba pang hihilingin...

hay! it just made me feel nostalgic

Currently feeling: nostalgic
Posted by Memaine at 05:11 PM | ibulong mo na.

new year. new life.

first day of the year 2006.

So what is the best thing to do but come up with your new year's resolution! (it's really not me making one but i gotta try it)

hmm.. well...?

Hey, you should wake yourself up every morning!

naah, it doesn't sood good because it is a sure thing I won't be able to make it happen...

hmmm.. another one... let's try this one...

Make myself happier, less anxiety and worry-free!

yup, that's it! Sigh.. hope this one works...!

Posted by Memaine at 05:06 PM | ibulong mo na.

last day of the year 2005

oh my.. it's the last day of the year...

time to move to the following year, and yes, say byebye to what has passed...

bye 2005, it was so great spendin' time with you!

sad face

Posted by Memaine at 05:04 PM | ibulong mo na.
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